Ethan, I can just picture him :)

Tonight, I have two priceless stories to tell. One told to me by his dad and the other told on Facebook by his dad. Yes, I know, kind of sad to learn about things from Facebook but I guess at least I know the stories, imagine them, and hold them in my heart.

The first was a trip to the park. Ethan walked to the park with his dad. In the park there was a large fire hydrant type of thing that acted as a hug water supplier to the kids. New York can be pretty hot this time of year. I guess Ethan started walking towards it and got kind of sprinkled and ran back to dad. Then he got a little braver and ran in just a little closer and ran back to dad.

The then got braver and did this back and forth thing getting wetter and wetter and giggling more and more till he went in completely and got himself totally wet. Dad was not as smart as the mom's in the park. The moms brought towels, my son did not. lol. He will have the towel next time. I can just picture the smile, the laughter, the giggles on little Ethan's face each time he gets braver and braver.

The other story from Facebook is that now my grandson is an expert at climbing on the coffee table and standing on it. When he is up there he calls to dad to come and catch him when he jumps off. Yes, I can picture it too. I can remember similar instances with my own kids but I really wish I could be there to enjoy it all. I feel like I miss so very much. But I guess just hearing about it and enjoying it in my own imagination will have to do.

On the other hand my grand daughter is learning how to smile. One day, my daughter told me, she got the hang of it. The next day she had forgotten how to do it and was trying to figure it out again. I hope she has it down pact in two weeks when I am there. I am expecting lots of smiles from that little one. I can't wait to see her. I will tell you all about it at that time.

Welcome Annabelle

My beautiful granddaughter was born on June 16,2010. Her name is Annabelle Katherine. She is so very beautiful. She was 7 lbs 1 oz at birth and 17.5 inches long. She has brown hair and for the moment dark eyes. She has a little round face. Her daddy tells me she isn't fond of eating and she sleeps all day and is up all night. I got to see her on video this evening and she is so very very cute. I hear she is the loudest member of that little family. That must mean she takes after our side since our side is definitely louder than her mom's side of the family. They are quiet people.

We are feisty. Well what do you expect from and Irish/Italian mix. She has her daddy wrapped around her little finger already. I can see it in his eyes, in the way he looks at her.

I want to say that one of my greatest joys in life is seeing how my sons interact with their children. How they got to be such great dads I have not a clue. Maybe somewhere along the line hubby and I did something right. But I really want to give the credit to God. Without Him I could have messed up really badly. I do also want to thank Him for her health and that everything went well in delivery. I am thankful for the way He watches over those little families.

Anyway, I didn't want to leave anyone in suspense so the news is now out!

Yes, Ethan again and other things.

My mother and daughter left for Italy this morning. They will be there for three weeks. What will I do with myself you may ask. The list goes on. I got on the computer and I saw my son on there. Naturally, I couldn't resist asking about my grandson Ethan. He's sick was the reply, but then talked on about some things I wanted to share. Things I don't want to forget, because when Ethan is older I want to tell him about it. It also connected to several things I have wanted to blog about the past month but just haven't been able to concentrate enough to do it.

I am happy to say that Ethan is finally getting out more with the better weather. I was sent some pictures of him hanging out at Barnes and Noble surrounded by books. My daughter brought home a delightful video of him chasing a little girl. Poor Ethan, he was quite at a disadvantage, because the little girl could quickly get up and run and Ethan crawling after her, was not fast enough. At that time, his crawling was somewhat better than his get up and run. Now I understand he loves being chased, and on video chat I watched with great joy as his dad chased after him. He ran away and started laughing. His laughter is quite contagious and it so warms my heart.

His nanny is now taking him to the park. He loves the swing. He is a child after my own heart. This grandma loves to swing as well. I too recently went on a swing. There is a wonderful park near my other son's house. We went to take a walk there and I saw the swing. Naturally, I couldn't resist getting on it. I discovered how much exercise swinging is. It works the arms, the legs and the core. You can do it for a long length of time without getting too tired. And when I closed my eyes I could imagine flying. To be specific flying into the arms of God. Got my 90 year old mother on there too and though she couldn't go as high she enjoyed it. Well back to Ethan. His dad told me this morning that he loves swinging so much he won't get off. That kind of forms congestion in the playground lol. Anyway, I know how he feels. I was unhappy to discover that my local school playground does not have swings in it. How sad for a child to miss out on such joy and exercise.

My granddaughter is due any day. I can't seem to think about anything else. She doesn't know how much she is loved already and how anxiously everyone is awaiting her arrival. I can't wait to see her and so very soon I will return to blog about her as well.

I wanted to share one other thought with you. The other day outside our home we saw a daddy quail and about 8 to 10 newborn quails with him. They must have been about one inch in size. The momma was nowhere to be seen and it was very obvious daddy quail with lost without his mate. He and babies ended up on our driveway. He couldn't get the babies up the driveway curve into the grassy areas because the babies were to small to jump that high. I tried putting a branch and an wood piece on the driveway to see if I could get them to climb onto them and onto grassy area but daddy quail wasn't smart enough to figure that out. Instead he took the babies under his wings underneath the wooden plank and protected them. At one point a big bird came around and the father quail attacked it. Quail don't fly unless they absolutely have to. And this one did. It was all very impressive. It reminded me of how God does the same for us. How he will take us under his wings and protect us. How he is always there when we need Him. It was such a wonderful reminder to be, so humbling and sweet to watch all of this. In the end my husband gently led the daddy quail and babies down the driveway and around so they could get onto the grassy area. Haven't seen them since. But I thank the Lord for the experience. God's creations are so awesome.

Ethan at One Year

My little grandson turned one this past weekend. I was there to see it. My mother and I few to New York for this big event. He turned one on Easter Sunday. Of course I brought and bought him many gifts. But I want to tell you about the one he really liked. I bought him about in the Christian Book store. I don't remember the name of it. But it has a button on the top. If you push the button it sings a very short song. The words are:

When you look in the mirror

you'll see his touch.

Cause God made you special,

and he loves you very much.

I would often sing with the son and he would just start to giggle. Most of the time when he was crying it would sooth him. It was truly amazing.

He now walks by himself. We bought him some shoes and by the time I left yesterday he seemed content with them on and was walking around in them. He was very afraid of walking in them at first. He was a lot of fun to watch when we took him to the park yesterday morning.

He loved watching all the children play. There was a little boy coloring. He walked up close to him to see what he was doing. He seemed so fascinated with his world.

Not only is he teething again but he is also in clingy stage. He has 4 favorite people. Needless to say I am not one of them. His mom and dad, his other grandmother, whom he sees very very often, and his nanny. I am looking forward to the day when he is older and do cool stuff with him and it won't matter if I don't see him every day because he will remember the places we go together.

Ethan plays well by himself. When he starts to focus on something he has great concentration. He will ignore everyone in the room. It is fun to watch him chase a ball around the room. He does that by crawling. He has learned to throw little toys over his shoulder. Yesterday he was crawling around dragging his pj's all over the room. He loves the noise of anything hitting the wooded floor. He will throw anything like tv controls and toys. He loves to turn off the bathroom light and he cheats playing with his pop up toy. He has trouble with pushing things down or turning levers so the little pop up guys come up. So he throws the toy on the floor and the pop up guys pop up. Then it is easy for him to push them back down into the box. This little guy is brilliant lol.

He enjoys playing Peek a Boo. It makes him laugh. His favorite part of the day is still bath time. He is very excited when he knows its that time. Honestly I would be excited too but not of the bath, but of the massage his mother gives him afterwards. I am all for massages.

He seemed to enjoy his Birthday party, though he had no idea what was going on. He was indeed surrounded with total and complete attention. I think he was quite happy with his Birthday cake as well. I know I was. The food was all delicious. What an all around great weekend it was.

Three beams of light.

Starting to recover but a long way to go. It has been a difficult couple of months. It took about a month for my father to get to his final resting place thanks to the Italian government and all their paperwork and delays. In the meantime moving my mother into my home was not an easy ordeal. She wanted to bring the kitchen sink with her. I told her there was no room for two kitchen sinks. Now we are going through the process of negotiating space for the stuff she brought. But their are three gorgeous light beams that puncture though all the commotion and difficulties. I brightest one of course is Jesus. As Easter approaches rapidly I must remember to what He did for me. He died and rose to save us from our sins. I am reminded everyday of how much I need him because no matter how hard I try I just don't cut it on my own. Enough about me I am sure you are sitting at the edge of your seat to hear what the other two beams of light are. Or have you already guessed. Yes, yes one is Ethan and the other is Baby Girl who is due to arrive in mid June.

It has been a long time since I have told you about my little Ethan. He is now about 22 lbs and as handsome as ever. He is an extremely intelligent little guy. You think I am being partial?

Well, let me tell you that at 10 and a half months he got angry with the rocking chair. He was trying to pull himself up on it but of course it was rocking and he was unable to do so. So he pushed the rocking chair to the well and then stood up. That that is an intelligent boy. He now can walk holding on to one hand. His balance still is quite there. But one of my greatest joy was seeing his this past weekend and I did get to watch him take several steps alone from his dad to me. He has the cutest little habit with his pacifier. Every few second or so he flips his pacifier around. Someone will be holding him and he brings his little had up to the pacifier and turns it upside down. He is adorable. He has taken quite a liking to his great grandmother and gives her much joy. He is very picky about what he eats and who feeds him. Only his mother, the nanny and other grandmother have the joy of that. I hear he opens kitchen cabinets at home and takes all the goodies out and plays with them. He knows exactly the order to open those cabinets too, because if he tries the wrong one the other won't open.

All I can tell you right now about Baby Girl is that she is growing bigger each day and she loves to dance. She loves chocolate cake too. One night her mother baked a chocolate cake and had some. Little Baby Girl started dancing her little heart out all night long. I hear she has quite a kick. I am looking forward to the baby shower in May and meeting her in August.

My Father's Death

Don't know where to start or what to say as usual. There are some emotions I can't express here because as much as I would love to they are too personal even for this. But I must say that I am blessed that God gave my a best girlfriend or two in whom I can turn to and express anything and everything my heart desires and know I will never ever be judged. I did not cry at my dad's funeral. I have a different way of grieving. I do the busy thing. I have to keep busy and focus on something, anything else. I am a Martha. (Remember Martha and Mary from the gospels.) I have to do. I have to pick up the phone and inform people. I can't sit down. I need busy work just don't put me in the kitchen! So that is what I did. Then at night when all is quiet I can then allow myself to think and let loose in the privacy of my room, with no other people around.

My father was two weeks short of 95. He died in his sleep. He went to bed and never woke up. That is the best way to go.

The wake and funeral were perfect just the way he would have wanted it. God went before us and helped me prepare everything. The funeral home was great. You know they can read your mind. They know what you need before you do :). I know that that they are supposed to do that but it still amazed me. I mean down to the smallest detail like Thank you notes. I was thinking oh I need to buy thank you notes and there in the packet they left me were a bunch of thank you notes. Too bad they don't write them for you lol. My daughter did a great job writing the obituary and my son's Eulogy was absolutely incredible. I was blessed to have all my children here and my daughter in laws for wonderful support. As I said. God went before us in every way.

So now its over and the real work begins. I ask my Lord to go before me once again to help us move my mother in here with us and to sort through everything. Sorting through everything is not so easy. But as the the Lord says with God we can do anything.

Skiing a love-hate relationship

There was a time when I loved to ski. There was no hate except getting up at 6 am so my husband could be on the slopes for breakfast by 8. We would have a front row parking space. If we were in the second row we were running late. We would be on the first lift ride up with the kids in tow. We would ski till the lifts closed with a lunch break somewhere inbetween. I very much enjoyed being out there in the fresh air, zooming down the mountain side and trying to keep up with the rest of the family. That was our Sunday, almost every Sunday for many many winters.

One winter, I got hit by a snowboarder, tore ligaments in my shoulder and couldn't ski for awhile. The only thing that did was make me paranoid of snowboarders, went back to skiing and nothing else fazed me for many years to come.

But somehow, time passed and I got older. We no longer ski every Sunday. In fact, except to spend an hour at the gym in the morning we hang around the house all day Sunday. You might say we have become old boring people. We relax and do our own thing. But once a year we spend a week at Snowbird ski resort. That is where I am right now. Even that started out as a total blast. We have ski in and ski out capabilities. All we do all day is eat, sleep and ski everyday for a week. Heavenly right? But one day I realized I wasn't 30, 35, 40 or even 45 anymore. Energy became more difficult to come by. One day I was skiing happily down a slope I had skied down hundreds of time and I fell. I didn't just fall I tumbled it my head on the ground hard my ski came off half way up the mountain and I fractured my leg. Actually, Thank God I got off the hook very easily. It could have been much worse had I not been wearing a helmet. We had only started wearing those the year before. But fracturing my leg made me think a lot about life. I don't worry much about death because if it happens I am gone, I'm with God and all is well. What I have come to fear most is pain and suffering and all the things I can't do if I am hurting. So, the love started to dwindle a little and the hate started to appear. Now I am not at all saying I hate to ski. I still love everything I have always loved about it. I can't ski as long as I used. But now I fear falling. I fear skiing on icy terrain. I fear getting hurt. In comes the hate. Now the question is will I eventually give into the fear and hate and stop skiing altogether or will I come to terms with the fear. I am still trying to figure this out.

In the meantime, when I am out there I relay totally on God's protection.